Chapter Eighteen

I spent the next few days thinking. Just thinking. I barely left the house, I barely ate, all I was focused on was making decisions and sorting things out. With the boys being on a Southern road trip, I was able to think freely and without distraction. Sure I got a few texts and calls, but I didn’t return any of them, except one frantic text from Max begging to know if I was okay. Other than that, I had no communication with them. I needed to do this on my own, without being distracted or having my opinion swayed. So, with all this thinking, I came to two conclusions. One, I didn’t actually feel anything towards Geno. Yeah, he was nice and sweet and pretty much the perfect boyfriend, but he wasn’t what I needed and I had to let him go. And two, I had, unwillingly, fallen for Max and I had to let him know. I figured I’d deal with Max first, so on the night they returned from the road trip, I got in my car and headed over there. I didn’t bother dressing up because it was just Max. I’m pretty sure he couldn’t care less what I was wearing, so it was just skinny jeans, flip-flops, and a fitted tee. On the way over, it started absolutely pouring, so I had to drive slower than usual to avoid an accident. Finally, I arrived and pulled into the driveway. I got out of the car and waited. I stood next to my car for about ten minutes trying to decide if this was the right thing to do and needless to say, by the time I approached the front steps I was absolutely soaked. After what seemed like another ten minutes, he opened the door. He looked so handsome. A little flushed, but handsome nonetheless.

“Hey,” I said and smiled weakly up at him. He wore an expression of shock and maybe happiness? Or maybe I imagined it because I wanted to see it.

“Riley what are you doing here?” he asked frantically. “Is everything okay, are you hurt?!”

“No, I’m not hurt, and everything’s more than okay. I just wanted to see you.” I answered simply, because it was the truth.

“Riley,” he said softly with a look in his eyes that I couldn’t quite place.

“And I wanted to tell you something too, Max I---,” I was cut off by a voice inside.

“Maxie! What’s taking so long? I’m getting cold,” the female voice floated out to us. I watched Max cringe and he stepped outside into the rain with me, closing the door behind him. I had wondered why he didn’t invite me inside and I guess that was the reason. Hearing that voice made me want to cry and I probably did. With all the rain, it was hard to tell. I slowly started to back away from him, down the steps and on to the walkway.

“Riley wait, I---,” he began, but I stopped him.

“No Max, I’m sorry. You’re busy. I should have called or something. Please, don’t let me keep you,” I said while turning to go. Before I could move, he grabbed my hand.

“What did you want to tell me?” he asked, staring at me intently.

“Nothing of importance,” I answered not being able to meet his gaze.

“Riley, just say the word and she’s gone,” he almost pleaded with me.

“Have a good night,” I said, breaking away from his grasp and making my way towards my car. I pulled out of his driveway and left him standing on the walkway, just staring after my car. Looking back wasn’t an option because if I did, I probably would have turned the car around, screamed at him to get rid of the girl, and taken my rightful place next to him on the couch. But I wasn’t going to be the weak one. That wasn’t me. So without a glance back, I drove home (a little too quickly for the slick roads) and crash landed on my couch. I didn’t even have the energy to make it upstairs. I just cried and cried on my couch. And finally, when I couldn’t possibly cry anymore, I felt empty. Like there was nothing to cry for anymore. I was just Riley. Just another girl who was stupid enough to believe the shit that Max said. Stupid enough to think that I was any different from the other girls he picked up. He just liked the thrill of the chase because I was unattainable. I had a boyfriend and I was willing to leave him to be with Max. Not anymore. I had to distance myself as much as I could from Max. No matter what that meant. Being cold towards him, avoiding him, whatever it took. I had to get myself off of whatever fixation I had with him. So without further contemplation, I decided to stay with Geno. It was almost like I was punishing myself, but I didn’t care. Geno did deserve better than me and I really should have let him go, but I made a promise to myself to be the “trophy girlfriend” so to speak. I would be perfect and everything he asked me to be. I’d be there for him, supporting him every step of the way. It’s what I had to do. It’s what I owed him. The next day I got up bright and early, went to the bakery, and packed up breakfast into a basket before making my way over to Geno’s apartment. He seemed surprised to see me but not unhappy.

“Good morning, Riley,” he said sleepily. It was easy to tell he had just woken up.

“Hey Geno,” I answered giving him a quick peck on the cheek before making my way inside. I walked over to the kitchen table and placed the basket down.

“What’s in there?” he asked pointing at the basket.

“Oh, just breakfast,” I smiled as I began to plate the food. I took out a variety of scones, bagels, and muffins along with orange juice and apple juice. “I wasn’t sure what you liked.”

“I like everything,” he answered coming up behind me and wrapping his arms around my waist. “This so nice. Thank you.” I quickly imagined how Max would have reacted if I had done this for him. He probably would have snickered and complained about how it was all “girly” food. That ungrateful son-of-a-bitch. Ugh. I was letting Max ruin my day and he wasn’t even here. No. I wasn’t going to think about him. I couldn’t. It hurt too much. So, I pushed all of those thoughts to the back of my mind and had an enjoyable breakfast with Geno.

“What time is practice?” I asked as I washed the dishes.

“No practice today. Have no plans today,” he answered chugging the last of the orange juice.

“Well, now you do. Go take a shower and get dressed. We’re going out,” I said with finality. He smiled at me and trudged towards the bathroom. I took a seat on the couch and about twenty minutes later he came out, his hair still dripping. That look was actually quite becoming on him. He leaned on the kitchen counter.

“Ready,” he said, smiling at me. I got up and walked over to him, slipping both of my hands behind his neck.

“You look so good,” I purred into his chest. I had to admit, he was quite easy on the eyes. Learning to fall in love with him couldn’t possibly be too difficult. He leaned down and let his lips meet mine. I kissed him back hungrily and let my head rest on his chest. It took a great amount of my will power to pry myself off of him and hold his hand instead as I lead him to the door. He reached for his sunglasses, then his car keys, however I made him put the keys back. “Nope. We’re walking.” We made our way out onto the street and proceeded to walk until we were in the downtown area. Every now and then someone would stop and ask for an autograph and then a group would form, but overall most fans were too polite to ask or didn’t even notice. Eventually we made our way to a park and shared a bench. We were sitting, just watching the people pass when I thought I saw a familiar face.

“Hey Geno, isn’t that Marc?” I asked tugging his arm and tilting my head towards the left. Sure enough Marc slowly approached with a beautiful girl on his arm.

“Hey guys!” he said happily standing in front of us.

“Hi Marc,” I answered brightly for the both of us.

“Riley, this is my girlfriend, Vero,” he said introducing us.

“It’s so nice to meet you,” I said smiling up at her. “I’m Ryan’s cousin and---”

“Geno’s girlfriend,” she finished. “I’ve heard quite a bit about you.” She laughed lightly.

“Oh?” I asked. “Well I guess I may have caused some trouble these past few days.”

“Don’t worry, everything I’ve heard has been good,” she assured me.

”We were just heading over to meet some of the guys for lunch. Care to join us?” Marc asked. Geno looked at me for approval and I nodded happily.

“Yeah, okay,” Geno replied. So Geno fell in step with Marc ahead of myself and Vero. I found that conversation came to us naturally as if we had been friends our whole lives. She was so easy to get along with and fun to talk to that I barely noticed when we entered the café. But when I did take a minute to look around, I kind of wished I hadn’t. We had approached a rectangular shaped table at a far corner of the restaurant. Sid was sitting at the head of the table and to his right was Jordan, next to him was Max, next to him was Kris, and next to him was Tyler. They had left all four chairs on the opposite side vacant. So, Marc took a seat all the way at the far end, across from Tyler. Geno took a seat at the other end, across from Jordan. Vero obviously sat next to Marc and across from Kris. And I was left sitting in between Vero and Geno. Across from Max. Got all that? Anyway, when I went to sit down, I could feel Max’s eyes on me, but I wouldn’t look at him. I was not giving in that easily. Surprisingly throughout the lunch, conversation carried on easily and without strain. Everyone seemed to be having a really good time. Jordan was cracking jokes like there was no tomorrow and everyone was in a great mood. I was enjoying myself so much that I happened to glance up at Max. He gave me a smile and I only looked away. I couldn’t fall back under his spell. About five minutes later Vero excused herself to the restroom and I joined her.

“So, what’s up with you and Max?” she asked while fixing her hair in the mirror.

“What? Nothing,” I answered a little too quickly.

“Come on Riley. He won’t stop staring at you. You won’t even look at him. Did something happen between you too?” she continued. In the short time that I’d known her, I felt that I could trust Vero completely so I told her everything.

“And now, this is where we stand,” I finished.

“Wow. It seems like you and Max both have it pretty bad for each other,” she said.

“Is that all you can take out of this story?” I asked in mock anger. She laughed and leaned against the counter.

“Well, I can tell you that you should probably tell Max what’s what. When the time comes of course. And Geno. I don’t know if you can make yourself fall in love with him. It has to happen. And to tell you the truth, I think you already have fallen in love. With Max,” she said with finality. As if it was the simplest conclusion in the world.

“Vero, I haven’t even known him a month,” I answered.

“So? Love at first sight?” she asked. “It actually does happen. And you two seem perfect for each other. Just give it time. It’ll work itself out.” Everything she was saying sounded so reasonable. I just wish it was as simple as that. We made our way back out to the table where the guys just finished paying the check. Everyone was getting up to go when suddenly I felt a hand on my shoulder.

“Can I talk to you for a minute?” Max asked when I turned around to face him. I looked over at Geno who was standing a few feet away watching us intently.

“Go ahead, babe. I’ll meet you outside,” I said. Geno smiled, nodded, and walked out the door. Max took a seat at our table and motioned for me to sit next to him.

“Yes Max?” I asked once I was seated.

“You don’t want to be with him,” he said simply, as if he was reading my mind.

“Um, of course I do. That’s why I’m with him,” I said. I heard the edge in my own voice.

“No, you really don’t.”

“And just who do I want to be with then?”

“Me of course.”

“Ha! Max that’s a good one, really. What would ever make you think that?”

“Oh I don’t know. Maybe the time you kissed me. Or both times you kissed me.”

“I was drunk. You know that.”

“And the first time?”

“I told you that I felt sorry for you. We’ve been over this.”

“I feel sorry when someone punches Sid or Jordan, but you don’t see me running over to them for a quick make out session the first chance I get.”

“And what? Those kisses were all one sided? I came onto you completely? You didn’t do a thing to lead me on at all?”

“I never said that. They definitely weren’t one sided. I wanted them.”

“So stop making it seem like I’m the aggressor here! You know damn well you want me too!”

“Too?” A smug look of satisfaction spread over his features.

“This conversation is over.” And with that, I picked up my purse and stormed out of the restaurant.